9-12-2010

today was a good day i stuck really close to my calorie count for the day only when over by just a few calories! so i am really excited about that. i also did a bit of walking today me and Ryan walked down to the store and got a water and a lean cuisine for dinner! he is being so encouraging! and that really helps me alot, i changed up my workout a bit today in the last one i did abb crunches for about 15 min. and i really feel it more than the other way i was doing them with the kit. and i have a few other ideas for changing up my workout in the up coming weeks, i really want to go jump on the scale but then again i don't. i need to wait till Friday i don't want to be weighing myself everyday. all and all today was really good. just really trying to take it one day at a time and not get to far ahead of myself

9-11-2010

today was much better than yesterday!!!!! i got both of my 30min workouts intoday!!! i am back to feeling great! i am doing a bit better at counting my calories. still realy hard. considering i can just go buy all the stuff i want i have to get stuff for everyone in th ehouse and on a small bugget to boot. to the food will always be a pit of a problem for me i guess. i got some new workout stuff from my mom that she let me barrow for a litte bit. and im going to see how that works out tomarrow. im going to start weaighing myself every friday. i even got a makeup vid done today and learned some really cool stuff that im going to post in a vid tomarroe aswell. closing thoughts: all and all today was a good day!

9-10-2010

last night i was feeling so good about everything. and then this morning i got upset and over ate i was realy disapointed with myself. and then i redid my food plan for the day and i was doing good and for some reason i over ate at lunch. but i did a 8min arm workout and i have done another 10min on top of that. but i still dont feel good about my choices that i made today. i got a new scale and my starting weaight is more than i thought it was its 310, i was shocked needless to say. im gonna try to do a 30min workout today later tonight. hopefuly it will make me feel somewhat better. and ready to get back on track tomarrow.

9-9-2010

for the frist time in a long time i feel smart, confident, beautiful and like i could take on the world.

i am realy proud of myself i stuck realy close to my food plan for today. witch was 1500 calories. i worked out twice today for 30 mins each time! for the 2nt day in a row! im getting a scale tomarrow and i dont think i have ever been this excited about that in my life lol.i never thought i could do this in my life and i just feel so freaking great!!!!!! i hope it never goes away. and working out has realy helped me with my depression alot! i realy feel like i could take on the world. nothing has realy brought me down. where as usualy just about anything could. i found my shade in the mac foundation that im going to reword myself with when i loose 25 lbs. just trying to take it one day at a time!

that is my meal plan for today. so far so good and im fealing great!
and my flavored water that i drink and my diet pills

9-8-2010 part 1

i feel realy good i just finished one of my 30 minute workout and i have already did a 10min arm workout earlyer today, im a little bit disapointed with my food choices today i could have done better and i know it.i plan on doing another 30min workout before bed tonigt and i plan on starting back counting calories tomarrow aswell. all and all im feeling realy good just a little worried about the food issue. im going to drop my calorie way down to eather 1500 or 1200 not sure witch one yet. i weaghed myself last night and it was not the right number cuz the scale is messed up but its what i haveto work with untill i get a new one.

this is what im going to reward myself with when i loose 25 lbs

9-7-2010

today i start my life change, i just worked out for about 20 minuets usthing this systen i got for my birthday! this is what i workedout with today and im going to workout for another 20 later. i have given up soda except coke zero and i have a little over a pack of cigs left and when they are gone they are gone for good ano i just need to workon the food. i need to make a meal plan or something but i will keep you updated i have set myself a goul for when i loose 25 lbs and i think it will help me stay motavated !

i have always been bad with diets, i try and i do realy good for a bit and then the moment i stop i slide right back into my old habbets, i realy have to find something that realy works for me and its realy hard. sometimes i just feel like a big loser and other times i wish that one day ill wake up and be tin or that some guy will pop up and grant me 3 wishes but i know that wont happen. i am going to have to dig down deep and find it inside myself to become the woman i want to be, i know ill more than likely never be a size 2 but thats it ok with me i just want to be a healther size. and not have to worrie about what clothes i can and cant buy cuz nothing fits right or it doesent come in my size i have thought about some of the medical options out there but i can aford them and or the corrective ones you need after that. its realy up to me and me alone to do this i know its going to be hard and im gonna want to quit but i need to try my hardest. im sick of being like this and i need this

This free digital scrapbook personalized with Smilebox

no one is even going to read this

i just want to get this off my chest i have had a realy bad past few weeks i have lost my only best friend i think i have been depressed and things are staring to finaly pick up i started a diet i feel good im finding it a little hard to stick to it but i know it works cuz i have done it before and it worked and then i just stoped and started back eatting junk but its time for a lifestyle changeim hopeing i can do it iam realy haveing to push myself i havent felt like doing any makeup vids cuz of the depression, i felt like i lost myself and no one cared like i was drowning and there was nothing i could do, yesterday was a realy good day i actualy got stuff done around the house and just felt good but its like it creeps back up on me when im not looking,

my best friend someone i have known for almost 10 years up and cuts me out of her life and replaces me she wasent just my best friend she was my sister she knew me better than anybody and people like that arnt supposto let you down like that and it hurts cuz now i have no friends that i can talk to in person

its been a long long past few days!!! im gonna be learning how to do some realy cool scrapbooking stuff and im realy excited and i need to send in my pics to the dead girl glamoure site so they can put them up, i just havent found the ones i like the most yet. been working on my farm on farmville trying some new stuff i dont know it i like it yet or not but we will see.

i hope my step dad had a great day today being that it is fathers day and all. he has been more like a dad to me that my real father, and for that i am thankful he is a great man and a wonderful grandfather to Adler

i love farmville

May/31/2010

Adler had a blast in his pool today! this is my fav pic of the day i just love the face he makes!!!

asteroid crisis

just did a look using hard candy and dead girl glamour cosmetics! pics are below let me know what you think! i realy like it alot!

dead girl amour link!: http://www.dggcosmetics.com/index.html

Dead Girl Glamour

i am a gead girl lol i promote deadgirl glamour cosmetics you should go buy some lol
all the other dead girls are very cool and they offer all kinds of tips and tricks with make up for all kinds of peope so there is something for everyone! and the eyeshadows are to die for! very nice color, last for freaking forever one even stained my lid.( and yes that is a good thing) there are all kinds of colors to choose from. sample bags are $0.99 and the full size jar is $4.99 a very good deal for eather.
here is the link:
feel free to look around!


i was sent 5 colors :Brutal, Jail house, Trick or treat(my fav),Trigger finger and Crisis
all very nice and unique colors
each color is pigmented and blends well.i think everyone should go check them out

This past weekend!

a lot of people have been asking me where have i been well just to let eveyone know my husbands grandparents came down from illanose and we whent to their family reunion
and we have been haning outwith them pretty much eveyday since thursday! but he is a pic and i hope you like it

finished

i am finaly happy with my blog layout!!! i know i said that just a little bit ago but then i found this realy cool site and i LOVE IT!! i worked realy hard on it and i hope you guys like it and feel free to let me know what you think! i am still up in the air about how i want to blog. 2 times a week or only for things i want to talk about. or once a week or all the time lol idk but ill figure something out

bolg2

i think i finaly got my blog the way i like it so yay for that. now im just waiting for my Adler bug to get home from spending the night with his grandmother

blog

im working on getting things the way i like it

i started a blog lol